Thoughts of death

No, not me. I am perfectly fine in that respect.
Thoughts of death in relation to others. With regards to what has happened this week. This year.

While I wasn’t specific on my Facebook, it was enough to have people ask if I needed to talk. Yes and no. What do I talk about. I don’t want to talk about how I feel, I instead think about how the deceased person thought in those last few moments.
Of course we would like to think they have family and loved ones on their mind, but what about other things, regrets, wishes, what they could of, should have said to someone.

Do they get scared, a moment of “why me, why now?” And thoughts of where their soul may go to, their thoughts.
Are there thoughts of ‘I shouldn’t have done that, look where I am now’
Do they know what is about to happen and are they scared of that specifically. Or just what they are leaving behind, family and friends.

For those who choose to take their own life, is there a moment when it’s too late to go back. Do they realise they shouldn’t be doing this. There are other ways to deal with it.
Are they peaceful and relaxed, knowing it is the right thing.
Do they think of their family and friends, or just the reasons they are where are.

A freak accident, do they even realise what is happening, or did they have no warning.
An accident at work. Did they die doing what they loved, were they happy in that fact, but lonely at the end.
And then there are the reasons one can choose, health. When you are told you’re a prime candidate for a heart attack, what do you do. Fix things so you can get off that list. Or not worry, thinking it will never happen to you.

Would you rather see your partner and kids with you in hospital at the last minute or want to spare them them the pain. Spare yourself from seeing their faces.

And all the family wants is closure, a time to heal and then time to start over.



5 responses to “Thoughts of death

  1. what annoys me about death is that before my dad died i had this absurd Hollywood notion that when someone dies; all the family and friends gather around and the dying person gives a long soliloquy about their life, their thoughts, and shares some wise thing about what everything means……

    but then when i spent the weekend with my dad as he died…..and he basically slipped in-and-out of consciousness and treated my mom so poorly because the cancer had gotten to his brain…..i dunno dude, all my childish fantasies about dying were crushed…..

    all my condolences to you.


    • Hollywood certainly has a notion that death happens in a nice way, all very calm and appropriate. Not the actual reality you’ve described, which I suppose is far more likely to happen. It’s really hard to come back from shattered dreams, I he you’re ok about it now. Thanks for stopping by.


  2. My husband and i have talked about death, especially as we see our parents health going down hill . We want to make the most of the next years and value every day. Unexpected death is hard on those left behind. Suicide is so sad. My thoughts and prayers are with you.


    • Thanks, all death is hard, but yes, two are exceptionally more difficult to deal with.
      We all need to discuss death more, as you never know what might happen, as in my two cases this week.


  3. -hugs- Death is not something we talk about much, maybe because deep down inside we have this mad idea that it will never happen to us…ever. But sometimes it’s good to ask the questions you’ve asked, because in a roundabout way those questions re-affirm life, and how precious it is.


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